||[Jul. 31st, 2004|06:18 pm]
If you haven't heard the word on the street for a few days, I'll fill you in. I went on my date and had a fantastic time, he is attractive for his age, educated, well mannered and is financialy stable. Everything you would think a girl would want. Well, actually, yes. BUT, I am not attracted to him, and if I don't have that then I'll never feel good. Perhaps I am reading into this too much. I mean it was only one date. But isn't that the point of dating? Figuring out what you like...well, I don't like olds. By olds I mean men over 30. Once again, I would like to state for the record, he is wonderful, just old.
So last night I was really pissed off b/c I was suppose to hang out with some ppl at the bar but things happened and I spent the night on my own. The last 3 weekends have been really awful, I mean vomit awful. I don't think I really care about going out anymore. I'll never meet anyone so whats the point. I'm so upset b/c I was having a fantastic week. I thought things were finally gonna start coming around again. Nope. I hate it when ppl promise you things and don't follow through. I know, I've probably done it. I'm sure everyone is a living contradiction, but I'll still complain as if I wasn't. I don't know about tonight. Who knows whats going on. Chris pissed me off the same way jacob did. And we, or at least most of us, know what happened between him and I. It would have been wrong but still forgivable if chris had been drunk and passed out or just really drunk. But no, he was fine. If he decided he didn't want to come to the bar or whatever, he should have called and told me so I wouldn't of been waiting, that would have been fine. But the fact that it was intentional is unexcusable. I just have a bad taste in my mouth over the entire night. Today has been bad. Nick still isn't going to pay what he owes me, b/c he doesn't have the money and doesn't know when he'll get it. I hate him if I haven't mentioned that a million times before.
I think my life makes me want to vomit.